turtle: have not seen such beauty as I do? See you almost have to pop out of the eyeball.
toad: Girl, you tease me, did not see me have goose bumps yet?
2, oriole see Xunsi the weasel said: weasel scolded: Dragonflies do not trust my mom asked: What does she do?
dragonfly: It was singer Oh!
Dragonfly Mother: Singer? Before a dig it!
4, an ant and tree crow fight!
ants: You kind of give me down!
Crow: So, you kind of give me up!
ants: Good! I'm waiting for you to have you look good!
Crow: What do you want?
ant: I'll go get all my brothers, shake you down and killed along with you!
5, both the welfare lottery feces shell mantis, a dragonfly feces shell: I want to put in a radius of 50 miles award to buy down the toilet, eat your fill!
feces shell dragonfly B: You Ah Tai Su it! If I won the lottery to bag a living, eat fresh!
6, male butterflies of the female butterfly sings:
along came the scream, the mother butterfly sings: hibernating frog couple in river caves. Drake: Look, more happiness. Duck on drake: Do not look, is the big boss, live in villas, honeymoon, let's say nothing in this life, sir!
8, the first day, the white rabbit to the river fishing, caught nothing, go home.
next day the rabbit went to the river fishing, or catch nothing, go home.
third day, the white rabbit arrived in the river, a big fish to jump out from the river, directed at the rabbit shouted:
TMD If you dare to use Hu carrots as bait, and I flat you die!
(a) drink too much of a village home into the wrong pen, the sow lying beside said: Wife: Give me some water, sow hum a hum, the village head said, do not chant will not fall down , Caesar what Johnson. Readily touched, said: buy leather you, or double-breasted it.
(b) of the old couple to take pictures, the photographer asked:
(c) of the day, a barber to the beat of a selling candied fruit, and to the police station the police asked the barber: Why did you hit the sell candied fruit? Barber said :***, perm in my room, he shouted out children, I really envy you, so fast. The old lady replied: Ancient Nepal pound cat! Startled foreigners, even the elderly will be foreign language! Presented its chocolate, dried sweet potatoes the old lady thought it was, and said: I Laiwu there! Foreigners fainted!
(VI) Butterfly on bees, said: You're a petty, packed in a sweet belly but are reluctant to give me a bee wrote: Hmm! Said I, you two antennas on his head so long Why do not message me it.
(g) {peer} beetles and mosquitoes love, beetles: The. Wife: ten, her husband: the complete it? Wife: it is too early, others do not get some sleep! I asked ten o'clock it? Wife: eleven o'clock in the whole bar.
(ix) the couple fighting, put a pillow thrown downstairs, a beggar was passing through, Jinki, and then flew the next quilt, beggars ecstasy, wiping away tears rushed upstairs shouting: upstairs in the big brother, Please, put that woman toss come.
(x) Wife: night is not trying to Event? Husband: old thought his wife: not allowed to say that tired after work that night, not the spirit, can not fool on the bin, her husband: a must, wife: That night, my clothes are washed for it.
(k) of a young woman out the trash, do not accidentally slipped in the garbage, was about to get back up again by a scavenging of the old man in his arms, feeling the old man said: people just do not live in town, Do not say such a good wife, do not the.
(xii) an NPC toes suddenly blue, miracle-working doctor diagnosed with cancer, so removed, a few days, two toes become blue, the removal of three days later, bluish feet wide, had to switch to large hospitals, the last expert consultation diagnosis: socks fade.
a farming town to catch a donkey, donkey red light, fined 10 yuan. Drink donkey farmer: Farmer even more gas: Farmer was in a rage, then shouted: Farmer fire: Farmer tears Road, . Farmer said: ;
secretary called her husband: these days I want to go to Beijing for a meeting with the boss to call her husband
lover: My wife was not at home these days, with me < br> Valentine's called counseling students: the teacher something these days, closed
students called Grandpa: these days not in class, you play with Grandpa Grandpa to the Secretary
Call: Beijing can not go, and grandson asked me to accompany her husband to call the Secretary of
: CEOs suddenly something not to Beijing for a meeting of the
husband to lover to call: his wife does not go another time to counsel students
lovers call: as usual these days!!!
students to call Grandpa: 555 teacher said usual these days ;
grandfather to the Secretary of the call: or go to Beijing now, are you ready for
3. a beggar knocked on the window saying: Give me some money.
looked under the President, said: it gives you a cigarette.
beggar said: I do not smoke, give me some money.
, said: I car have beer, you drink a bottle of the bar.
beggar said: I do not drink wine, give me some money.
, said: If this is so, I take you to mahjong, I pay you betting on, is you win.
beggar said: I do not gamble, give me money.
, said: I'll take you to the sauna to enjoy Get in, I'll take you back, let my wife see: a non-smoking, no drinking, no gambling, no prostitution a good man can be mixed Chengsha Yang!
4. from the police academy Mr. Zhang graduated two years of marriage, the wife always felt something was different, suspected his wife was having an affair. day, Mr. Zhang is always found his wife on a cell phone text messages from strangers, and the contents of each message is the same: Zhaoxiong ask you to help me do something. After two hours, the snail has not come back, the turtle anxious curse: fuck I do not come back to starve to death! Then the door came the sound of a snail: I say you are his mother not to go!
One day, the cow ass out of a problem, ask Ass brains, or not answer. Cattle curse: What ass, Nanzuonvyou it!
2. seven years after graduation, and finally take a big project, building a thirty meters chimney, two-month period, cost three hundred thousand, but to Advancer. Finally finished out late last year. Today people to come to acceptance, being yelled die, not get paid. Damn! Drawings look backwards, others to dig a well!
3. a drunken man accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by crowd, a policeman came: What happened? Drunk: do not know, I am also just arrived.
4. The doctor asked the patient how the fracture. Patient said, I think there are sand shoes to hold the poles shake shoes. TMD has a bastard through there, thought I was electrocuted, he took a stick gave me two sticks!
5. One said, turtles father, mother and son of a bitch turtle family decided to go hiking, they took a Shandong the end of bread and two cans of chicken
sea, then went off to Yangmingshan. Hard to climb ten years, at last! They sat on the floor, remove the equipment quasi
prepare dinner. Results, but found no band can opener!
son of a bitch: have to wait for me to come back! can not go back on Oh!
Turtle Mom: a! Parents regardless of the turtle! Old couple decided to start.
out getting ready to eat cake ... ...
Suddenly, son of a bitch stuck his head out from behind a tree ... ...
son of a bitch: cans device? I waited twenty-five years, in whom I wait until the end
it! I hate people lie to me!
6. small Xin: Daddy, why does the name of which three gold ?
Dad: lack of gold in your life, so take the name of Xin, like some life in the water to take named Miao, and some life in the absence of wood called Forest.
small Xin: Dad Dad, you say that Guo Jingjing and her sister what life in the missing?
7. a pair of male and female friends sitting on a park bench in love, women suddenly want to fart.
of the man said: I Division of Cuckoo called, not as you listen to.
men really than hear.
Thus, women in the Valley birds do not?
M: fart too loud, I could not!
8. turtle injured. let the snail go to buy medicine. after 2 hours. snail has not come back. turtle anxious cursed: I do not come back to fucking die! Then the door came the sound of a snail: I say you are his mother not to go!
9. somebody keep a pig, sick, abandoned, then know that return pig , the number of abandoned reactive. day, the car turned a lot of bending abandoned pig, late-night call the family, asked: body, the ants were all fall down. At this point there is one in the elephant's neck, falling ants loudly called for crashed. Then a student stood up and said: eat a good amount.
13. Xiao Ming: ; was unable to bear the question: No, ah ... ... the sentence: : ;
I am writing this letter slowly, because I know you see the word offensive!
our next week 2 times the rain, the first 4 days following the next 3 days the second time!
Huaguoshan you been? I had a great in heaven well, in the absence of gravity, so the stool, urine, tears and snot are not fall, do not you say bitter?
us good to eat beef noodles , Maybe you can come with us to eat hot pot restaurants West!
your sister give birth to the Goddess of Mercy, because students do not know the man or woman, we do do not know if you want to be uncle or aunt!
I sent you the clothes you get it? afraid when I go to send overweight, so put the buttons cut pocket in the clothes!
is late to write here, the time to me to play, remember not to drink plenty of water, or urine does not come out here to be painful!
P. S had wanted to send money to you, but the envelope has been glued!
17. ; a patient to the doctor complaining of dyspepsia: I recently very normal, what pulling eat, eat cucumber pull cucumber, watermelon eating watermelon pull, how to restore normal? doctors silent for a moment, that you can only eat shit out. < br> 18. someone to go to Shanghai on business lost a dollar in the street, police said: He can not help but sigh, , put his four paragraphs cut went to play mahjong, earthworms father thought, put his into the minced meat. earthworm mother cried and said: Will die cut so broken! . said to him: you come, I carry you now and then .. .. .. After a snail on the table and saw an ant .. .. turtle said to him: Come on you .. so the ants also come up. . Ants came after the snail .. .. see the above said something to him, , a fire, father and mother escaped, leaving only one son still inside. Mother is very nervous outside the house shouted: .. Quick, ~ are on fire, but also to stay inside .....~ half-day leaves no fish on the hook, he changed a piece of bread, like a half-day did not fish on the hook ~ ~ no way ~ as he had to replace it, or half of earthworms did not fish on the hook under the ~ ~ ~ He angrily threw into the water out 100rmb cursed: Buy their own! ! !
24. table with a cold, runny nose, but he forgot to bring a handkerchief, and to keep the nose to nose forced inhalation. Write on the blackboard> language teacher suddenly turned to a lot of noises: Teacher and> said:
He replied: man; : Why do you print counterfeit money? criminals, said: the real one I will not print
27. Cowherd and Weaver Girl know down to earth bath, shaking ZZZZZZZZZ interpretation of a love story, it tells us: there is no opportunity to take a bath at home , so be sure to go outside shower to wash .....< br> 28. Xiao Ming back to the classroom with the teacher after using the toilet, said: : can not but speak out ah? > 30. The female mosquito is: not a good thing, one by one all grown up Chishi
31. I spent 80,000 bought a Western Zhou pottery, called yesterday to
32. son: ah, and then what. the bullet is too scary! you? nurses, injection of the fortune. fortune tellers said: You, the first half doomed no women; not the man's face lit up: That I should have a right later in life? fortune teller said: hey, to later in life you get used to a person's life
37 . a person eating beef can not see a piece of beef noodles, they pointed to the bowl asked the boss: how beef is not beef noodles? boss said dismissively: Do not be too serious, do you expect from the wife eat cake in a wife?
38. Three mice were tasting the United States, Japan, China, wine, drink American wine mouse, go to step 3 down; drink sake mouse, go to step 2 down; mice drinking Chinese Erguotou , holding a kitchen knife, shouted:
he was dead.
funeral that day.
his family cried: '
Shuang Shuang Ah Ah ... ....'
passersby puzzled. asked: 'What are cool A. '
family cried:' Shuangsi ... ... Shuangsi!!
41. a man to jump, just shouted back to his wife: impulses, our long way to go! Chief carpool with elevator, after the Secretary released a fart chief said: things you can not afford to be magnanimous, to what you use? Why are so dear to me, okay! The very creative, ugly is not my intention, God will not lose my temper, I will brave live with my endless creativity. to set off the beauty of this world! In fact, I really, really very creative ... < br> 45. friends to go mountain climbing to the top, face the beautiful mountains and rivers of a girl shouting: the motherland ah! my mother! a crush on the boys quickly followed by her screaming: the motherland ah! my wife's mother!
46 . before I bought two dogs, called face! came a voice: and they had a falling out, and almost beat them, because some of them say that you monkeys, apes and some that you like, just too much! did not see you as a pig!
50. panda birthday, We said: I made two wishes, one is able to cure my dark circles, the other is hope to have a color photograph
51. Kuangzhui bees butterflies, butterfly is married to a snail. bee puzzled: He Where is the butterfly better than I answer: whatever the outcome, people have their own house, which, like you live in the dormitory
52. One day an elephant in the bath. Suddenly there was an ant came to this they said. you stand up. started to stand up. ant! you sit down and go. elephants do not understand Yeah you want to ask the ants. one will stand up and sit down for a while. ant replied! lost my underwear I see is not what you wear to steal
53. production team has just bought a donkey, but he died a few days. just a mare in heat. production team of employees to call to the production of business in the field captain. , but the jackass is dead. is to buy a head of a donkey, or you come back? disgusting things
55. a meteor across the night sky, I quickly make a wish, I hope you can become prettier. Who knows just finished Xu wish meteor I was not intentionally make things difficult for you?! !
56. give me a canteen of bread as a fulcrum, and I will be able to tilt the Earth! to the cafeteria Dafan, hit after dinner to ask Dafan master, You three conditions, the bat said, What is it? Toilet flies: Road does not phase the different plan, eat in good You Shayong, the light you've seen a few beautiful ass?
60. sophomore, all quarters of the girls like Zhou Hua Jian's songs, a tape was borrowed by us to go. Day, the girls ask spread: Zhou Hua Jian I do? Girls bunk answer: in my bed too! Silent two seconds, and then all the overturned bed.
61. a boy to a classmate to take a sheng nickname, called Pan Zhu, girls crying to the teacher, the teacher agreed to criticism of the boys the next day, speaking teachers in the class: nicknames, can not people like the Han to Jiaosha it? Ordinary dogs look at it dismissively said: idiot, see, I was undercover! Seven Fairy Lake in the bath
, Journey anxious to see.
monk seriously towards the lake, shouting: donor, careful crocodile ah!
naked fairies flying ashore.
Pig sigh: ah-led intelligence can not go beyond four
monk to travel by plane, the way the crash, but only three parachutes.
So, Tang Seng said, and everyone to answer, not answer to the jump.
Monkey: Monkey King, the sky a few sun ah?
Monkey King: A.
Monkey: give you a hand.
Monkey: Drifting, the sky a few moon ah?
Drifting: A.
Monkey: also give you a hand.
happy side of the Pig, so simple question.
Monkey: Journey, there are few stars in the sky ah?
. . . .
Pig jumped down.
Before long, four of them and fly to travel. The way they crash, or only three parachutes.
they continue to answer questions.
Monkey: Monkey, when the PRC was established it?
Wukong: 1949.
Monkey: give you a hand.
Monkey: Drifting, the liberation war, 死了多少人 ah?
Drifting: 250 million people.
Monkey: also give you a hand.
Monkey: Journey, that 250 million people in the name of what?
...... Journey has just jumped from one.
third time, four of them and to travel by plane, and on the way and an accident.
this time, the Pig said: Master, you do not ask, I just jump.
then plunged into the stream. Joining hands
Monkey: Amitabha, the parachute has four
1. One night, a naked man called a taxi, the driver stared at him intently, Naked furious and shouted: You Yeah have not seen his mother naked man! Driver also furious: I see where you money from his mother!
2. male and female friends to sleep a room, the woman drew the line: Over the line is brutal. Found that men really do not wake up over the line, the woman the man severely beat a slap in the face: you do not even like animals!
3. Hongtao meet foreign guests one day and tried to get in a word, saying: I am Hong TaoLiu, foreign guests, saying: I am his mother was seven of diamonds too!
4. Zai Zai was my father repaired, he went to find her mother complained: Zai Zai: Asked the family dinner the day: cliff waving a mouse, a short front paws, jump again and again, to learn to fly, watched it fall next to the mother bat's badly beaten, worried that: it father, or to tell it, it not we own it!
7. and friends to see the sunrise the top of Mount Tai, a friend pointed to the sky, said: out when the distance was Tizhaokuzai curse: Ghost: God, I want the next reincarnation, like an angel white body, and with a pair of wings, but I still want to suck blood.
God: What do you do Whisper it reincarnated.
2. A friend for the first time work-study program in the park Maibing Gun, I am sorry crying; this time, where one person suddenly shouted: That friend one, but was happy to follow the call:
3. Ants and elephants get married soon, the elephant died. Ants while buried in the elephant, while crying: A boy crush on a girl and blow the courage to ask what that girls like boys
.
5. One day, I catch the last train out of breath while chasing repeatedly calling: Master! Master wait for me ~
suddenly famous passenger stuck his head out the window, slowly in front of me: Monkey King. You do not chase the
6. Bio exam day, of which one question is to look at the legs of birds to guess the names of birds. Really do not know of a Health, angry on the paper to leave the examination room of a tear. Invigilator very angry and asked him: Mongolian beautiful actress After the performance, met with the leadership came to power, and then her hand, Wenhanwennuan, not half a day client was incensed, cordial and asked: What's your name? The actress excited
wife phone tag emotional rabbit joke
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